The other night I went to the engagement party of my research assistant's brother. I had no idea what to expect or what to wear. I have only been to one Indian engagement party and I was pretty underdressed for it. My RA sent me a text message that said no special clothing required, everyone's wearing western clothing. That is actually quite difficult because I brought very few clothes from home with me. I wore some nice pants and a fun dress that I bought in London. I was picked up from IIM campus about 830pm by several girls in short short fancy dresses and tons of make up talking on their phones and smoking cigarettes - it does not take much to make me feel old and out of place. We drove for a while out of town, picking up others and switching cars along the way. My RA's family is in the navy, so they had the party at the local naval base. We arrived late, but it did not seem to matter much. There were chairs all around a nice lawn with a bar on one side and a DJ and dance floor on the other. Everyone was really nice and interested to meet me. There were a few older men with huge white mustaches - which mark them as from the Rajput caste, many young people gathered in groups by age, and family members here and there. Everyone except the children was taking advantage of the bar and I wondered whether the rules must be different for alcohol in the navy (Gujarat is a dry state). The family is mostly Roman Catholic and my RA refers to herself as Anglo-Indian. Her mother seems very young and spunky and her father seems extremely gentle, I could see it in his eyes right away. Before I knew it everyone - and I mean everyone - was dancing together in front of the DJ. Grandparents, parents, teens and children were kicking up their heels to Bollywood, Elvis and hip hop. All kinds of tasty appetizers were circling around and it was quite fun. It took me a little while to get on the dance floor, but how could I not, even my RA's grandmother was up there?

Farm Life and X-mas in Baroda

I have been staying on a friend's farm for the past several days and loving every minute of it. It is totally rustic and fantastic. I am allowed to do whatever I want in the kitchen, and after living a dorm room for over a month I realize that I have been dreaming of cooking. It makes me feel so good just to chop vegetables and the like. The air is lovely, I've never seen so many birds and we can go and pluck eggplants off the bush for dinner. There are many water buffalo and there is homemade butter and yogurt.

I came back to Baroda for a birthday party on x-mas, which was a nice way to avoid missing this day with family. I will write more as soon as I can - internet access has been and will be limited for a few more days yet.

Back from Rajasthan, and already off again

I apologize for a lapse of several days in my blog writing! I didn't realize until now that a week has passed. It has been quite a week indeed. I have attained an office space and begun to work with my research assistant. I spent three days in Rajasthan interviewing laborers, seed sellers and agents, middlemen that bring laborers to Gujarat to work in cotton seed plotting fields, and farmers. I was aided in all of that by a labor union in Rajasthan and their lovely volunteer who is my age and speaks English, Hindi and Telugu fluently (perhaps she will be willing to make a trip to Andhra Pradesh with me for some interviews!?). It was absolutely fascinating and exhausting. I have spent the day today preparing to go to Anand again to stay with a farmer friend of mine. In exchange for help contacting local laborers and farmers, and setting up an interview with a seed seller/agent, I am expected to help on the farm and cook. Since I have not had the facilities for cooking since I left Seattle I am delighted by the exchange.

In Rajasthan I found that my Hindi skills badly need refreshing. No one I met spoke or understood Gujarati, despite being very near the border with Gujarat. I had a lot of trouble making Hindi - not Gujarati - come out of my mouth. After a few days of full immersion, though, I felt it beginning to come back. I was grateful to have an interpreter who knew what she was doing and with the patience of a saint!

On the trip back I had a scary experience. The woman that had been interpreting for me had dropped me off at the new bus depot in Dungarpur. I was waiting patiently for the bus to arrive and trying to avoid the eyes on me from every direction. The bus arrived and I made sure that it was the correct one before boarding. I tried to get comfortable in my seat as others boarded and there was the general chaos and bustle. I took out my book and tried to focus on it, but after a few minutes I felt the commotion outside intensify.

I turned around to see a huge crowd of young men beginning to gather behind the buses (there were about four or five other buses getting ready to take off). They began to shout something in unison that I could not follow. I waited for them to move on, but as more and more people gathered my heart began to race. I looked at the faces of the other passengers to try to understand whether I should be fearful, or just ignore it. A man a few seats ahead looked a little westernized and likely English speaking, so I made eye contact and asked him what was happening. By this time everyone on the bus, and the other buses on each side was looking at the growing crowd, and it seemed to me with attentive, nervous, eyes. The man said, I don’t know, it seems like something is wrong. I asked whether it might be some kind of protest and he said perhaps.

One of the buses pulled out, and the men parted for it. This made me hopeful, but I was still unsure whether it would be better for me to get off the bus or stay on. Our bus did not seem to be headed anywhere. Another bus arrived and suddenly the men began to jump onto the roof of it. I took a small bit of video of the men climbing on from the back and all of the shouting. I sat anxiously hoping that our bus would soon pull out without incident. I was sort of chanting to myself, please don’t let this turn into a riot, please don’t let anyone take notice of me, please let us leave before this escalates any further.

I made myself stay as calm as possible and noticed that the crowd’s attention seemed to focus on this other bus. I was so grateful when we started to back away, and the men parted to let us through, I could have cried for joy. I hid my face and saw only a man taking photographs and a police man with a whistle. I did not find out what it was about. As we drove away I took deep breathes and calmed down. I tried to take in the sights of the countryside and just be at peace with being on my way ‘home’ to Ahmedabad.

Otherwise, though, the trip was really fantastic. I accomplished more than I had hoped to and learned so very much. It will take me several days to type up everything that I did and heard and saw. Each night I scrawled page after page of notes, but now I am going through the process of adding to them and putting them into the computer. I think that when I am finished with the notes it will be something like 25 pages typed single spaced!

I am delighted that I will be in Anand and back in Baroda for x-mas time. It would be really sad to be here on campus, not that people will be gone (most people do not celebrate x-mas and it is not a holiday here) but because it would be the same as any other day. A lot of folks here have been asking me about my plans - it is assumed that I am Christian or Catholic because I am American and white. I will be going to a birthday party on x-mas for a photographer friend of the woman that I stayed with the last time I was in Baroda.

Things are definitely moving quickly around here and I have to go finish packing and preparing for two interviews tomorrow morning before the trip! Happy holidays and I miss you all terribly!

Baroda: Last few minutes of my birthday

A birthday I am not likely to forget. I woke up in a lovely house and ate toast, fruit and tea with a friend of a friend of my step mother's. She gave me a little cute box as a gift and wished me success and good luck and many good years. She dropped me in town (Baroda) at my friend Dan’s hotel – the super funky Presidential Towers. We ran off to escape his very sweet if overwhelming Parsi host family. We found these cool murals, which two guys in charge were delighted to be able to show off to us (at least it seemed to me). We then went to the Baroda Museum which was large and interesting but not well cared for. There we saw everything from a whale skeleton to old Chinese dishes, sculptures and paintings of wealthy folks. From there we went to the Landmark – a huge western style bookstore and more. Unfortunately we only had Coffee Day as a food choice and we were starving. We bought books and then we went to see a movie: Sorry Bhai. It was perfectly horrible, but also entertaining. We both alternated all day between missing our loved ones and marveling at India.

I was delighted to spend my birthday with a friend. During the movie, at the intermission, there were two amazing old-school style commercials. I’m not sure that I can explain them, but they were hilarious. I still don't know whether they were real commercials or jokes, they seemed to have been produced in the early 70s. We left there and rushed to the hotel to change for the wedding. I had bought myself two new nice kurtas and dressed in a good old salwaar kamiz. Unfortunately it turned out to be not nearly the shiny, flashy, colorful, sequined dress of nearly all of the other 500 (my guess) women attending the wedding. One young woman asked me why I was not wearing a sari, and I said: because I don't know how (kind of obvious, I thought). We got on a bus with others going to the wedding and I got a small taste of what Dan’s life has been like since September. Firoz (his host mother) is hilarious, loud and loving and a little overbearing. The wedding reminded me a lot of a Jewish wedding I went to in Brooklyn so many years ago. I mentioned to Dan the resemblance of the two weddings and he said that, yes, Parsi weddings were a lot like Jewish weddings. At one point the goofy DJ began playing I just called to say I love you and Dan and I learned that it had been both of our favorite song years before. Then they played Stand by Me and I told Dan that that was our song, that our friends had sung it at my wedding. Then my rickshaw came and Dan and I had to say goodbye, and I rode off to wonderland – also known as 'Amaltas' after the tree with the big long beans. My host's brother was having a 28th wedding anniversary with a few other folks. They sang happy birthday and happy anniversary and we blew out a single candle together. There followed some interesting conversation (politics, Mumbai, prohibition and Bt cotton) and some mango wine appeared.

Anand

I left Tuesday morning at 530, I think it was, from Ahmedabad by train, and arrived in Anand at about 8am. I made my way to the Anand Agricultural University and it was pretty dead. I was feeling sick and wandered around a bit looking for a bathroom. All the buildings were locked up. I went into the guest house feeling fairly desperate. I asked a boy that was sitting there for the bathroom and he went and got another boy who went and got a third boy. He said, Madam, this is a guest house. And I said, yes I know. Could I please use the bathroom. Thankfully, after several minutes of deliberation, they then opened a room for me.

I called a woman I had been planning to meet with for lunch. I had only met her once for two seconds at a workshop, and at first she said that she would wait to come and get me until about noon, but then once I realized that the entire place was closed for a Muslim holiday, she took pity on me and told me she would leave sooner. It was a beautiful day and I was glad to not have to come up with questions and find people to talk to. I just sat in a garden near the organic farming center and continued reading my book (Sophie’s Choice). Since there weren’t many people around I didn’t draw all that much attention, and I was able to relax and enjoy the lovely morning weather. Purvi called to say that I could start walking towards the gate, and a girl approached to talk to me, which is really quite a rare occurrence. Usually I have to smile and nod and ask some simple question in order to get someone to enter into conversation with me. But before long my lunch date was there.

We went into town and sat in a coffee shop and then went to a nice chain south Indian restaurant. We chatted and chatted. It turns out that she was a research assistant for Bina Agarwal (a famous Indian feminist economist). She had lots of information and tips and I think she is going to become a friend. She invited me to her farm and told me that I could stay as long as I want as long as I am willing to cook for her and work on the farm some. I told her that I would be delighted. The very next day I got a text message from her saying that there were three villages near Matar in which there were about 100 farmers growing Bt cotton, and would I like to talk to them? I responded by saying that she is awesome, and she said 'tell me something I don’t know' – so I have clearly made a new friend.

In the news

Yep, that is me. I went to the IIM Traditional Food Festival with some other Americans living in Ahmedabad and a photographer ran up to us, snapped a photo and ran off. A rickshaw driver I know saw the picture, showed his kids, and saved it for me.

My head is spinning. I found a research assistant. I had two interviews today with central figures in the history of Bt cotton seed production in Gujarat. Tomorrow I am going by train to the city of Anand to visit the Agricultural University and then I continue on to the city of Baroda (Vadodara). I'll spend a few days (including my birthday) in Baroda with a friend of a friend. Baroda is supposedly the cultural capital of Gujarat, and I am looking forward to seeing something new. A friend from Harvard doing research in the south of Gujarat will also be there.

It was a hugely productive day today, but I am so exhausted that I cannot manage to do the writing that I need to do before leaving town. I wish I didn't have to be in India every day. A day off now and again would be lovely. I enjoy it here. It is fascinating and I learn new things constantly. But there is so much to take in, so much attention on me in the streets and around, so much intensity, that I long for the ease of daily life in Point Reyes or Seattle.

The past few days I have been feeling that things are finally getting off the ground. Yesterday and today I had my biggest success yet. I have been looking for the managing director of a certain seed company based in Ahmedabad since June. I have known all along that an interview with him will fill in so many gaps that exist in my knowledge of Bt cotton seed production in Gujarat. Over the summer I tried all of the telephone numbers and email addresses that others had given me to contact him, and none worked. I found a vague address or two, but did not pursue that option because I was both nervous about my language skills and hopelessly lost in the streets of this city. Since arriving almost three weeks ago I have been trying more numbers and asking around. A few people called for the phone listing for me and were told that no such listing exists. I went by the student activities office the other day and asked the man in charge with a Portuguese name (who I desperately wish spoke Portuguese, but does not and swears he is 100 percent Indian). At first he tried calling the phone company and they said there was no listing. Then - as we talked I was impressing him with my knowledge of elementary Gujarati - he had the feeling he had heard of this company. He drew me a map to a place where he thought there was a 'famous' seed company. (The heart of this story, I think, is that the search for this man has also been the process of me getting up the nerve to actually talk to him.) The next day I ventured out. I followed the map on foot and past crowds of curious onlookers. Without much trouble I found the site highlighted on the map, but it was a government headquarters for agro-industries support, or something like that. I went in and was sent to talk to the boss. He was surprisingly sweet and helpful. I was given water and offered tea. The boss declared at first that there is no such company, but as I just sat there and told him the name again, he picked up the phone and called the telephone directory – this is the fourth time I or someone else on my behalf had tried this route – but I waited patiently just the same. Only, for some reason this time it worked. He wrote down the number, but no address was given. He then called the number for the company and wrote down the full address. He even told them that I was on my way. He drew me another map and sent me on my way. It was really some incredible luck. I followed that map and again faced some oppressive heat and crowds of curious people watching me stroll by. In no time I found myself facing a sign with the company’s name and I could not believe I didn’t have my camera to get a picture on this momentous occasion. I wandered into the office and introduced myself. I was met with mild curiosity from the folks in the offices and another glass of water. I was called into an office and a man told me that the person I was looking for would be out for a while since he had just had knee surgery. I was again offered water and tea. I left my card and wrote the name of a professor from the US that has written about this man, and there was an immediate spark of recognition. Oh yes, the man said, he was just here recently, I will tell Dr. Desai that you came by to see him. This morning I received a call from Dr. Desai himself saying that he would be willing to meet me anytime and that I should just go over to his house. I set up the appointment for Monday (I need time to prepare for this important interview). I literally jumped up and down after hanging up.

The weather today is like a dream. Hot, perhaps in the upper 80s, with this light breeze pushing the warm air around. It does not seem as polluted as usual. It feels like a perfect summer day in northern California, when it is finally warm enough to swim in the ocean.

Tomorrow my first report is due to my advisor in Seattle. I have been trying to fill my time with thinking about what I have done and what I am planning to do. I've been fairly successful at focusing on this, but there are moments of loneliness and some fear that creep up. When I look at my proposed schedule for the next four months, I see week long stretches of time in south Rajasthan and in northern Gujarat, with a few other trips here and there (assuming that my visitors will still come despite the attacks), and a few days here and there that I will be writing and planning here at IIM in Ahmedabad.

If this schedule really does work then the longest stretch of time in Ahmedabad is ending in this next week. I am relieved by this. There is only so much I can do from here, and soon the two main friends I have here on campus go back to the US. There are about five Indian students that I am acquainted with, and hopefully I will be able to get to know them a bit better over time, otherwise I will be desperately lonely. I have been volunteering some time at a local NGO in which I have met a lot of great people, so that is a big help. And tonight I am having dinner with three other foreign researchers living in Ahmedabad at the house of the one from Italy. Hopefully that will also be a nice network for me.

The week after the next I will make my first trip to several towns in Gujarat, ending with a short trip for my birthday to the old Portuguese colony - Diu. That part of the trip will be with a friend who is living in the south of Gujarat, from Harvard, who is doing archival work on a Fulbright, although I haven't heard from him since the attacks and I don't know for sure whether he will still be up for it. I really hope so.

Recommended Listening

I have been listening to this webcasting from the South Asian Journalism Association. It is fantastic for understanding the wider context through discussion, and a careful sifting through of information and the latest from Mumbai. Check it out: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/saja/

Thanksgiving Day

I am grateful to have been able to spend the day with a group of people that are kind and with whom I share common concerns and values. It was a meeting I have been looking forward to for a while, and it was everything I hoped it would be. I also realized a while after returning to campus how thankful I am for having had the distraction today. I am thankful that my mind is so full of questions related to my research that I can somewhat avoid thinking about what has happened and what is happening to the south. When I do think of it I feel so many things, and I am reminded of the confusion I felt after the bomb blasts here in Ahmedabad in July. I am thankful this evening to not be in Mumbai, and I am thankful to not have witnessed personally any of those horrible events. I am thankful for the emails from my friends and family, because even though I am an 8 hour train ride away from all of that, it has certainly had the power to unsettle me.

Terrorist Attack in Mumbai

I just now woke up with a text message from Sage. I didn't know anything about the attacks as I was asleep in my bed in Ahmedabad. I don't quite know what to say just yet, except that I am perfectly fine and safe.

--

I checked in with an Indian friend of mine in Mumbai and he was also safely at home away from that area of town. While it is a beautiful day in Ahmedabad and I have a meeting in a few hours that I have been waiting for since I arrived, still I feel, as I did in July, totally shaken. That area of Mumbai, not the fancy hotels (which I cannot at all afford) but the area in general, had sort of become a getaway place for me, and it felt safe. I certainly know all of those places. I don't really understand how it's possible, but somehow if you are not directly impacted by these tragedies, you just keep going. There have been so many attacks in India in recent years, so many horrible attacks, and yet everyone else has to just hope that it will not come any closer. Knowing that Americans were one of the targets does concern me, as there is really no hiding one's nationality, but there are relatively few Americans and foreigners in general in this area of the country, I think that makes me feel a little better.

It is certainly days like today that I am confused about being here, confused about what I am doing and utterly homesick.

The last few days all sorts of things have happened. I've met some 30 fellows from a local NGO, in which young Indians, mostly from the US, come back to India to work on some project. These range from helping to build bathrooms to helping a small business to expand and become more professional to helping create other, non-work, spaces for young rural to urban migrants. I spent the day with this group on Sunday while they were having a workshop at Gujarat Vidyapeeth. Some of you know that Gujarat Vidyapeeth is the institution that gave me an affiliation in the end. It is the university that Gandhi started and was the first vice chancellor of. During the day I heard about the individual projects of these fellows, took a tour of the campus and learned to spin cotton (not very well, but still), with the help of three female students from the university. I might have stayed in the dorms of that university instead except that there were many rules and the amenities at IIM were unbeatable. I agreed with the current Vice Chancellor Iyengar yesterday, we met for the first time face to face, to stay at Gujarat Vidyapeeth the last week of March in order to get a feel for the life there and to give a talk. Living there involves wearing Khadi clothing (homespun cotton), waking at 5 for prayer and cleaning, eating breakfast, meditation...

After more than a week at IIM I have grown used to the place, the food and my routine within it. I think of it as though I am spending a lot of time here at the moment, but there will be weeks at a time when I am not here at all, but rather making trips to border areas between Gujarat and Rajasthan, where many of the migrants that work in Bt cottonseed pollination fields come from. I am still unsure of when I will be ready for that. I need first to meet with a contact that I have not been able to meet with since my return. He is the one that everyone else I speak to points me to. I also badly need a research assistant that can act as an interpreter, for I do not speak Rajasthani nor the tribal languages of south Rajasthan. But I think that these things will happen soon enough, and in the meantime I am planning a shorter trip to visit a nearby farm and to visit an agricultural university to speak with the head of the agricultural biotechnology department. I am also desperate to find someone willing to make a very important phone call for me. I tried calling this person that I have been very interested to speak with, with no luck. It is really difficult to make myself understood when I need to call someone else first and explain over the phone who I am, and who gave me this number, and what I am looking for -- in Gujarati! Hopefully tomorrow a Gujarati friend of mine - one of my teachers from the summer classes - will be willing to make the call on my behalf. We'll see.

I spent several hours yesterday at the Police Commissioner's office trying to complete my foreigner registration. While I was sitting in the waiting area the sweetest little girl with the biggest eyes I've ever seen started talking to me. Her shy older sister and brother added a question here and there. She told me they are Muslims from Pakistan also registering with the police. They asked me if I go to temple, where I am from, why I am here, what I do, what the exchange rate is between the US dollar and the Indian rupee, etc. Right before their mother came and they left the little girl gave me a little candy, waited until I had accepted it and put in my mouth and then asked me whether I liked it. So sweet. The encounter made me feel so much better about being at the scary police office. And when I looked around I realized that now that I have been there perhaps six times, it really isn't so bad.

A little while ago my room started to smell of smoke so I turned the fan on. But then it got really strong and I opened the door to see the entire hallway filled with smoke, and so I hurried up the stairs to the next floor and the way out, holding my breath the whole way. It looked like there was smoke coming out of every floor. But as I looked around everyone was acting normal. I went into the student activities office and asked what was going on. They told me that they were spraying to kill mosquitoes and I asked what on earth they were using that it smelled and looked like particularly fowl smoke: a kerosene based insecticide, which they spray every week. I was relieved that my building wasn't on fire, but I took a long stroll to avoid exposure to it. As I walked around I saw the guy with his huge plastic sprayer, with no mask or protective gear. I suppose I haven't yet been bitten tonight.

Now my advisor advised me not to spend too much time blogging, but with the lovely comments I have received and the prospect of more of their kind, I have to write more than once a week. Today was a winner. I spent the morning at a local NGO that brings Indians born and living abroad back to India as fellows to work on various projects for social justice and civil rights. I was fortunate to get to brainstorm with the woman in charge and she, of course, had all sorts of comments, ideas and contacts for me. In the afternoon I went to Gujarat University where my Gujarati language professors work. It is clear that if I am going to make progress in my Gujarati studies I will need to get off campus as much as possible, study on my own a little each day, and continue to take lessons with these professors. I was reminded of how very kind they are, and how hilarious one of them is!

While it feels as though things are moving slowly, it has only been four days since I arrived in Ahmedabad and I already have a long list of potential contacts. Now I have set myself to the tasks of studying Gujarati, emailing and making as many phone calls as I can each day, and reading and writing as much as I can. I am still very much in the planning process of my research and every conversation, every reading, every brainstorm changes and furthers my project a bit. It's kind of fun and kind of scary! I want to get out to some farms soon and to a few of the agricultural institutes to start talking about cotton production! I want to get my feet dirty!

So, I am beginning to feel settled here at IIM, and though I am homesick, I am getting used to where I am. I am also just barely beginning to see where I might be going with all this, but I'll let you know the status of this in the next few days.

A few days on

I made a quick trip to Fabindia to dress up my room a bit.

New girl

This is my first day in the dorms at the Indian Institute of Management in Ahmedabad. The room is nice and it even has wireless! I need to get a few things to spruce the place up. My welcome package included: a phone for my room, a plug in mosquito repellent, and a surge protector. The room has a nice big desk with shelves, a bed and pillow, two big post-it boards, two chairs, a little stool and a cabinet that is like a military locker. At one end of the room there are double doors that open out to a green area and walkway. There is a security guard at the top of the stairs 24 hours. I've noticed some other foreigners, but hadn't talked to anyone until lunchtime. I was sitting feeling a bit miserable about the status of my language skills and about not knowing a soul, and then a German guy leaned over to me to ask why he hadn't seen me before. We talked for a little while and I learned that there are 38 European exchange students and that they are all leaving soon. I wonder whether I will be the only foreigner after that. He told me that all the classes are in English and that nobody speaks Hindi or Gujarati in that group. It is a strange thing that even when I get my Gujarati back up to speed the only people I can count on speaking Gujarati are the staff and anyone outside of the gates, otherwise I have no idea. The Indian students could be from anywhere.

It is hard to know where to start with all of this, but I am trying to spend the next few days getting myself completely set up here and starting to make phone calls, and then I will start making contact with local NGOs and having meetings with the contacts I made over the summer.

Tomorrow to Ahmedabad

Just now out in the bustling street I ran into a very strange woman from my Hindi classes in Seattle. I don't remember her name, but I do remember that she spoke very slowly and quietly and seemed awfully naive. At the same time she was probably the best Hindi speaker in that class and she had grown up in an ashram. I thought it would be quite amazing to meet someone I know by coincidence in this city, but then there is really only about a 15 block radius in which tourists tend to roam around here. Clearly I am one of them, but since my first time here I see Mumbai as a place that I can come and find many of the things, and certain comforts, I like without leaving India. For example, a place that I can go and write and plug in my computer without too much trouble, a croissant, a beer, some fish or chicken, things like that. I've decided not to beat myself up about getting to know the rest of the city.

I am nervous and excited to see where I will be staying in Ahmedabad. I arrive tomorrow evening around 6pm and I am supposed to take and taxi to the campus, look for dorm 4 and ask for my room key - we'll see! I cannot emphasize enough how nice the weather is here - how much better that when I was here last! Apparently this is the time to come because of the weather and because the tourist season is not yet at its height.

Typically, I left the rest of a very important funding application to be completed here. So I am sitting daily in a crowded little internet cafe slaving away. Wish you all were here!

Return to India - Mumbai

I arrived in Mumbai today and feel more than a little disoriented. I'm happy that I planned to stay only a few days here as I am starting to feel anxious to settle in and take my stuff out of my suitcase. After five nights in a 16-bed room, however, I am delighted to have my own funky room with a door that locks and a bathroom all to myself! The internet options are not as good as they were a few months ago, but at least the tiny little caves are still open here and there. The flight from London seemed like nothing for some reason, which is fantastic, I even slept!

Yesterday I was finally able to meet with the woman that was my excuse for going to London. I haven't been able to think about it all and write it down yet, but it was definitely positive. It seemed like the beginning of a long term thing, perhaps there will be a post-doc for me when I'm done with all of this.

I already have a meeting when I get to Ahmedabad. I also found out a few days ago that I will be staying at IIM in the women's dorms, which is what I originally wanted - so that is great!

The weather here in Mumbai is fantastic, and the streets are as crazy as ever. Well, I think that's about all I've got for now. Love to you all!

Final few days

I definitely have that feeling now of having one foot out the door, but I am happy to say that this feeling is making me look around more. I am trying almost as hard as I did in my first days here to take it all in. I am trying to feel settled before I leave on Monday. I suppose so that it will feel right to come back in two months. I have been able to make two really great contacts. And just yesterday I almost ran off into the North of Gujarat with two activists in order to accompany some migrant workers headed from Rajasthan to Gujarat to work in Bt cotton seed pollination fields, but alas, I don't yet have research permission, and I can likely catch them on the way back in October. Also, I am still in school! I have homework to do and tests to take! I'm hoping I won't regret not taking this opportunity.

Last night, after a meeting with the aforementioned activists, we had a lovely dinner in a little restaurant that is set up to look like a village. It might sound ridiculous but it is very well done, the food is delicious and there is a vessel museum that is absolutely fantastic. All of our teachers came and brought their families. The three of us students that are still here gave speeches, it was very sweet.

Calico Museum

It has been a crazy week! We are having more class time to make up a bit for ending the program two weeks early. This morning, though, we went the lovely Calico Museum. This is really one of the most special things in Ahmedabad and I have been waiting all summer to go. The only time visitors are allowed is for the tours that are given 1030-12 daily. The woman that gives the tours is known all over India for being extremely stern and rushed. She scolded me several times for lagging behind the group and I pretended to not understand her. You are not allowed to bring in cameras, so I drew some of the things that were the most interesting to me, but you can imagine how often I got behind that way. There is one wing of the old mansion that houses the museum which is for technical aspects of textile making. The block printing was particularly fascinating and I am constantly impressed by the skill involved in some of these fabrics. There were very old fabrics and embroidered hangings and clothing from all over India. Each time we entered a room a dim light would be switched on, and then as we walked through the light would be shut off and the door closed tightly behind us. Some of the designs I loved the most had very interesting plants and animals, particularly the snakes and banana and mango trees were the coolest. The grounds were also lovely. There were peacocks and pools with water lilies and parrots and mosaic terraces. Any one of you that visits me in the coming year will certainly be taken there.

I am having a difficult time weighing my options in light of the situation in Ahmedabad right now. Things have been calm since the blasts on Saturday, but the news warns that there may be several live bombs in the city. My colleagues and I are going to speak to the Embassy and to the directors of our program today and try to come to some kind of decision, which is to say, to stay or to go, and if the latter, when? I will certainly keep everyone informed about what I decide to do.

I'm safe

Hello all, I am safe. The horrifying tragedy of more than 16 bomb blasts that took place in this city on Saturday was in another area of this city. I believe I heard the last bomb go off at the hospital while I was in a store. At the time I thought it was thunder. The numbers on what has happened seem to be all over the map. The English-language papers here at first said that 50 were killed and over 100 injured, but the state government's numbers are smaller. I don't have much time to write at the moment, but I want to assure everyone that I am safe. I will write more soon.

Bombay!

After five lovely days in Bombay, I returned with a stomach infection that has kept me in bed for days! I went to the doctor yesterday and was very interested to find that his office reminded me of a funky antique shop, but he was nice enough and gave me some treatments that appear to be working so far.

But Bombay...A few of you have heard from me already that Bombay reminds me so very much of Rio de Janeiro that I almost felt it familiar. The humidity, the decay of the buildings, the very fancy next to the dreadfully downtrodden, the lush flora, even the designs on the sidewalks. We stayed at the YMCA which was a great little hotel in the middle of things and allowed me to visit all sorts of museums, stores, restaurants and parks. I got a visitor's pass to the glorious University of Mumbai library and was able to do some work there for a couple of days. I wandered around, despite the extreme heat, down to a fish market and got to see a few different neighborhoods. Some friends treated me to a home cooked meal and I very much enjoyed myself. I will write more and post pictures tomorrow - I hope all is well with you!

Palitana and off to Mumbai!

Wow, it has become difficult to keep up with everything that's going on!

Last weekend our class went on a trip to Palitana - a town that is filled with Jain temples - about four hours from Ahmedabad. One in particular is absolutely fantastic. It is at the top of a huge hill and there are 3600 steps to the top. The way up was hot and long but not all that difficult, but when we began to descend it began to rain. The steps became slippery and difficult to navigate, and together with goats and donkeys rushing past, sadus and sadhvis running down, men and women being carried and children also running, it was total chaos. This was the final weekend of the period during which Jains make the pilgrimage to this site, so it was particularly busy. We had a lovely time and it was wonderful for me to see another area of Gujarat (called Saurashtra), and this one is a huge cotton growing region, so it was of particular interest to me. The one difficulty with the area is that the Gujarati spoken in that area is quite a bit different, and very difficult for me to follow.

Tonight my classmates and I leave for Mumbai. I am absolutely delighted because this will be my first time, and I am ready for a five day vacation - it is summer afterall! We will take a train called the Gujarati Mail. In Mumbai we are staying at the YMCA, which everyone says is just a normal hotel, and it is 'centrally' located - though I haven't the slightest idea what that means in Mumbai. I am planning to use this trip as a chance to relax, see the sights a little, and to get into my research and proposal writing. I am delighted to report that after several weeks of not a single response to my attempts to make contacts I am suddenly flooded with interesting leads and I will need the time to write emails and make appointments. When I return to Amdabad next week the real craziness will begin, and I will have reached the halfway point of the course!

Classes are going quite well and I am even beginning to be able to communicate with people. Mumbai will likely not do me well in this, and don't ask about my Hindi, but when I return I plan to turn up the heat to get as much out of the final weeks as possible.

I miss you all dearly! I will post a bunch more pictures in the next few days!

Udaipur

We returned from Udaipur this morning at 4am and I am paying the price this afternoon. I had to leave class a bit early because I was coming apart at the seams. I ventured out again this afternoon only to make contact with you all, and then I will rush back to the quiet of my room. I am very homesick and sleepy today. Certainly this has to do with that feeling that comes with returning from vacation, and returning to the harsh reality of daily life in a huge polluted and fast paced city. Have I mentioned the traffic? The horns are s constant soundtrack that I have had to learn to not hear.

In Udaipur I had a lovely time, reading for my own work, reading the paper, ordering room service on our balcony, and watching birds and monkeys making their way through the day. There were also sites to see, and I have added a new slideshow, but mostly we read and read and it was wonderful. Udaipur is much smaller than Ahmedabad, and far more beautiful, but also a lot more touristy.

Two of the best things about the trip were that we could have beer at the restaurants (Gujarat is a dry state), and the last hour of the train ride into the city through the Rajasthani countryside. There is one photo of it. That stretch of the ride was very very slow, so I could see well the handful of brightly clad women farmers in the fields already at work early early in the morning. It was breathtaking, particularly after three weeks in one of the largest cities in India.

Udaipur, Rajasthan

I am delighted to say that tonight a friend and I leave for Udaipur where we will stay until Sunday. We will take a sleeper train there and arrive at 8 am tomorrow morning. I have really gotten into the book A Suitable Boy, which Sage gave me to finally read while I am here in India. What a fantastic book, and so much of it relates in subtle ways to the things that I am hearing, seeing and learning every day. This weekend will be a combination of relaxing, finally working on my research proposal, studying Gujarati (of course), and reading this hefty novel. I may even finish it before I leave the country! I promise pictures upon my return!

Bharuch

On Saturday morning a couple of us arrived at this funky hotel in the city of Bharuch and awaited a friend of a friend of a friend to come by and pick us up. She arrived at 11 am and there began two days of adventure! Shirin first asked us each about our research interests and set about to find related information for each of us. We toured around and saw a Mosque built in 1030, several beautiful old Parsi houses, we met tons of interesting people, visited a farm on the Narmada river, met with a Parsi priest and saw a fire temple and a tower of silence. We saw fisherpeople communities and swimming water buffaloes. We ate Parsi food and visited museums and libraries. Every minute of it was fascinating. This Thursday night a friend and I are off to Udaipur, which everyone tells me is a lovely lovely place.

Off to Bharuch

Tomorrow morning at 5am two of my classmates and I will travel to Bharuch City. It will be my first Indian train ride (so many first times!). This will also be the first time that I step foot outside of Ahmedabad within Gujarat. I am delighted, and I can't wait to begin to get a feel of the countryside. In Bharuch we will stay in a little Parsi hotel.

Today we visited Gandhi's ashram and it was lovely. The heat is unbearable today, as everyone waits for the relief of rain that has not yet come to Gujarat, but it was very interesting to see the historical site. Gandhiji's writings in Gujarati are completely illegible, unfortunately, but I will get some of his typed writings so that I can work on my reading skills (which aren't too bad!).

We had our first test today and I was reminded of why it was so significant for me to pass my generals exams (I am ready to be done with tests!). It was extremely frustrating!

The weather reports say tonight the rains will come, together with thunder and lightening, we'll see.

The Police Commissioner

My classmates and I have been waiting for one of our program coordinators to take us to register with the police. Yesterday was our day. Before we left the office where our classes are held we were told that we would need for our 'landlords' to come with us to the station in order to verify where we are living. Having read a few novels about Indian bureaucracy, I had an immediate image of how this might play out. Fortunately, by asking around we figured out a way around this (bringing a letter written by our host families along with a bill to prove their names and addresses). We went to two different stations and finally succeeded in getting the paperwork. We returned today with the paperwork and all went smoothly, but our next task is to return to the commissioner's office on Monday for 'interviews'. I don't have any idea what this commissioner might want to interview us about, but no matter what it will be a learning experience. Tomorrow we have our first Gujarati test. I'm happy to say that in reading and writing I have come a long way already, but in speaking I am not yet at the level of a small child.

Gujarati Dinner for 45

First off I have to say how childishly delighted I have been to see animals of all kinds in the middle of the city. Camels pulling fruit stands, families of monkeys traveling down the road, goats and cows. The monkeys were especially surprising because they are very big, grey with black faces. They don't seem at all interested in me, but I keep a safe distance nonetheless. My host family's house has a roof top garden in pots and a bathtub with small trees in it. In the late afternoon when I read there I find myself watching falcons, hawks and ravens circling overhead.

Last night my family had 45 people over to the house for dinner. Over the past week I have pretty much caught up to the Gujarati I knew by the end of last summer, but this doesn't mean that I am in any position to make small talk in groups. I decided to take the party as my starting point. I was perfectly useless and spent hours smiling and speaking in english with a few people. Everyone was very nice, and some older men and women teased me (which it seems to me is a very good thing), but in the end I could only promise the crowd that I would speak much better the next time we should meet. The food, by the way, was unbelievable as usual. The highlight was the ice cold mango juice, which is almost like pudding.

This morning my classmates and I had a cooking class at our teacher's house. It was wonderful. As a cook myself, I was delighted by the unfamiliar cooking instruments, methods and spices. I will have to write down everything I can recall when I reach home. By Monday I will be sure to finally get some pictures up!

Day to day

Veja embaixo para uma entrada em portugues!

I am happy to say that I have recovered from my illness, though I am knocking on wood as I write this. The dinners that I have shared with my host family have been delightful: a mixture of hindi, gujarati and english in front of a table of delicious homemade treats. Beautiful breads with ghee, several kinds of vegetables, chutneys (wow - the super spicy garlic chutney is out of this world!), buttermilk, and a delicious mixture of rice and lentil cooked together to perfection. The daughter in law of the family makes me breakfast in the morning and sits and watches me eat it. We chat about films, food, etc. I wake up every morning very early, I suppose because I am not yet settled in to the 11.5 hours difference between here and the US.

Yesterday after class the four of us students went shopping. Mostly they were humoring me, because I had only one kurta to wear. It was quite the spree; I bought five lovely kurtas (long shirt with short sleeves), three pairs of pants that took some getting used to, and two dupattas (long scarves). I am set for the summer! Later, at home, I set to the task of washing my clothes. It is so so very hot that washing my clothes was nearly as fun as playing in a broken fire hydrant. And on top of that, my clothes dried in minutes!

I haven't managed to take many photos yet, and the internet is not nearly as convenient as I would like, but I will hopefully get some up by the weekend.

I am starting to settle in to the pace of urban India, and I can see that I will begin to like it over time. By far the most difficult part is how much I am missing Sage.

Agora, me desculpe amigos que nao leem ingles. Nesses primeiros dias eu estou achando morar na India bastante dificil: passei super mal no inicio, esta fazendo calor muito pessado (45!), e simplesmente estou tendo muitas experiencias novas todo dia. Da para ver que eu vou gostar cada vez mais de estar aqui, a coisa que ainda me faz triste e saudades da Sage. As aulas sao boas e estao melhorando todo dia, mas a lingua e bastante dificil e muito diferente. Leio e escrevo, mas falar e outra coisa. Vejo muitas similaridades com o brasil - tentarei descrever as mesmas no curso do tempo que estou aqui. Se quiserem deixam mensagens como "comments". Um grande abraco a voces!

Just the Begining

Just after I wrote my entry yesterday I became violently ill. I spent the entire day in my hotel room with what must have been food poisoning. Fortunately, I seem to be more or less better today. Though I still feel rather weak and sickly. I went to my host house for the first time today and it seems strange and interesting. It is an apartment on the 8th floor of a large, and seemingly run down building in which live a couple in their 60s, their son, a grandmother, and I have seen two maids so far. I have a small room with a bed and a closet. On the inside the apartment is airy and bright, and has lovely decorations. Dinner tonight should be a major test on my language skills, and it will be my first homemade Indian dinner! We had our first classes today and they went well. I am begining to remember what I learned last year. Oh yes, and I also rode a rickshaw for the first time today!

First moments in Ahmedabad

Walking from my hotel to the nearby internet cafe just now I felt as though I was making my India debut. I was noting people taking note of me, particularly women, and feeling the harsh sunshine on my face for the first time. I arrived in Gujarat this morning filled with anxiety, a bit of fear and some excitement as well. I had to take long deep breathes as I rode into town from the airport. I tried to remember my first arrival in Belo Horizonte, Brazil in 2001. That city also felt intimidating and so very foreign to me. I remember that it seemed anything but beautiful and friendly. Less than two years later that city was a second home, and it came to be my favorite city in Brazil.

Tomorrow I will meet my host family and I am trying my best to be calm about it. I have no idea what to expect, no idea how it will feel, but I am trying to gather all of my charm, patience and humor for what is to come. I am also looking over my notes from last summer's Gujarati course in Madison and hoping that I will be able to make it to the intermediate level tomorrow in my placement exam. I am delighted to see the great progression of my work over the course of the eight weeks of that class.

I can't wait to start taking photographs to include here. There are so many new sites and sounds and smells! I am sharing a room with another Gujarati student and very much enjoying her company. She has come to India many times and was in Gujarat 10 years ago. She does very interesting historical work on cotton and textiles. I am happy to have her to tag along with this first little while.

Monsoon and my arrival

I have arrived, and apparently the monsoon season arrived along with me. There have been several delicious down pours already today and the air is thick and warm. More than once I was drenched and dry within 10 minutes. I haven't seen much of Delhi as of yet - we were in orientation in a conference center all morning long. The little I have seen reminds me a lot of some parts of Brazil. I am in a nice enough hotel with western toilets, air conditioning and such, so I am more than comfortable. After orientation my fellow Gujarati students and a Kashmiri student and I briefly toured around and did a bit of shopping. I bought my first kurta, pants and matching doopata (pictures to follow) at Fab India. Apparently there is another Fab India in Ahmedabad. The store is filled with what seems like every possible shade, pattern, color and size of Indian clothing for women. I could spend hours trying to find the most interesting combinations. I found a pleasant outfit that I think will be both conservative enough and that doesn't make me feel like a fool to wear. Tomorrow is when the real adventure begins. I leave the hotel at 4am for my flight to Ahmedabad. It seems we will be staying with host families, though that part is still very unclear. My spoken Hindi is a bit sad, but I understand more than I had expected. At the moment I am in the office of the hotel with a few Indian men typing away and taking phone calls - there are very nice and speak very slowly to me. I wish I could understand well enough to get the jokes that they are constantly exchanging. I am trying to stay awake long enough to get myself some dinner.

In a week I'm off

Next Friday I am off to Delhi for two days and then straight to Ahmedabad. I have very little idea of what to expect, no idea what to wear, and no idea whether I will be staying with a host family or living in a flat with the others in my program. I have been watching the weather report for weeks and reading the only existing guidebook on Gujarat. Apparently the rains are coming soon and I can expect 85-107 degree days.